Can't believe I'm doing this...

[Mr Potato Head]

Thought you lot might like this, despite the inclusion of politics & religion!

SATAN'S TEMPTATIONS:

In the beginning God covered the earth with broccoli, cauliflower and spinach, with green, yellow and red vegetables of all kinds so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives. Then using God's bount iful gifts, Satan created Dairy Ice Cream and Magnums. And Satan said "You want hot fudge with that? And Man said "Yes!" And Woman said "I'll have one too with chocolate chips". And lo they gained 10 pounds .

And God created the healthy yoghurt that Woman might keep the figure that Man found so fair. And Satan brought forth white flour from the wheat and sugar from the cane and combined them. And Woman went from size 12 to size 14. So God said "Try my fresh green salad". And Satan presented Blue Cheese dressing and garlic croutons on the side. And Man and Woman unfastened their belts following the repast.

God then said "I have sent you healthy vegetables and olive oil in which to cook them". And Satan brought forth deep fried coconut king prawns, butter-dipped lobster chunks and chicken fried steak, so big it needed its own platter. And Man's cholesterol went through the roof. Then God brought forth the potato, naturally low in fat and brimming with potassium and good nutrition. Then Satan peeled off the healthy skin and sliced the starchy centre into chips and deep fried them in animal fats adding copious quantities of salt. And Man put on more pounds.

God then brought forth running shoes so that his Children might lose those extra pounds. And Satan came forth with a cable TV with remote control so Man would not have to toil changing the channels. And Man and Woman laughed and cried before the flickering light and started wearing stretch jogging suits.

Then God gave lean beef so that Man might consume fewer calories and still satisfy his appetite. And Satan create d McDonalds and the 99p double cheeseburger. Then Satan said "You want fries with that?" and Man replied "Yes, And super size 'em".

And Satan said "It is good."

And Man and Woman went into cardiac arrest.

God sighed and created quadruple by-pass surgery.

And then Satan chuckled and created the National Health Service.

THE FINAL WORD ON NUTRITION:
After an exhaustive review of the research literature, here's the final word on nutrition and health.:

Japanese eat very little fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.
Mexicans eat a lot of fat and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.
Chinese drink very little red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.
Italians drink excessive amounts of red wine and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.
Germans drink beer and eat lots of sausages and fats and suffer fewer heart attacks than us.

CONCLUSION:
Eat and drink what you like. Speaking English is apparently what kills you.

[oldherbaceous]

Well all i can say to that Mr P.H, Is that we always seem to need someone or something to blame, instead of taking control of our own lives, and having a little bit of self-discipline.

Bring back national service for men and woman, i haven't had anyone tell me that for a long time now.

[lizzie]

I think this diet lark is dead easy really.

1. Eat a little of what you fancy once a week as a treat.

2. Cook meals from scratch using fresh produce

3. Get off your arse and go for a brisk walk or go swimming or go to the gym or go line dancing or go jogging or go horse riding, anything that you enjoy doing.

4. Smile and laugh cos you'll feel better in yourself

And so the sermon ended............

[oldherbaceous]

Dear Lizzie you have got such a special way of telling it how it should be told.
And in a funny way too.

[lizzie]

Herby, the way I see it is life's short so why **** about. It's only common sense. The trouble is, imho, that people have too much choice. When I was growing up (not that long ago) you were given a good, home made meal which you ate. If you didnt you'd be huingry until breakfast. You said thank you and got on with it. We played out all the time, running round, riding bikes, playing the next street at football or rounders or tennis or anything.

Now, people are too precious over their kids. I know we want to keep them safe and sound, I want to do that with mine, but a little dirt won't hurt them. My son comes home from pony days at the stables absolutly filthy but he's very rarely ill. Houses are spotlessly clean and kids wrapped in protective little bubbles where their immune systems have no chance of developing properly. People won't let their kids play out if it's "too cold" or raining cos they might catch a cold. They don't realise that a good icy blast does them good. Just wrap them up snug and they'll be fine.

That's what I think but I expect someone won't agree but that's fine. I like a good discussion

[peter]

Lizzie, not all of them, mine goes out all the time, just wish for the sake of my ears he'd take his ruddy coat with him and not roll in the mud.

OH does bang on about it, just a bit.

He has three magnificent stud marks on his upper thigh from Sunday's rugby match.

As for choice, have to agree with you, I bought smoked salmon as a treat, little sod decided he did not want it, therefore did not like it and was not going to eat it. He'd had it before and we had to prise the slices off him to get our share and then he ate it on christmas day at his granny's.

Oh well he is 13, so I suppose that is at least half of it, especially as I can see the trend starting in the 10 year old.

[lizzie]

I agree Peter, not all of them are like I describe. Unfortunately, around here they are. In Andrews school they are and it's terrible. The kids are off sick all the time. There's only my son and 2 other kids who have consistant 100% attendance at school. My daughter has the same and received a certificate at the end of her GCSE's for achieving 98% school attendance since reception class. The other 2% she was in hospital so fair enough.

My friends mum had a good solution to fussy eaters. Eat it or wear it. Worked everytime with her

As for your 13 year old, it's his age. My 17 year old was the same. Could of killed her

[oldherbaceous]

Dear lizzie, you talking about children playing out in the cold, a few weeks before Christmas, on about Anglia news, there was a primary school that were having some lessons outside all through the year what ever the weather.
They showed the childrens faces as they were filming, and there wasn't one unhappy face, a bit different to being in the class room.

I do agree with you a lot of children are to mollycoddeled.

And how true number four is in your previous reply.

[lizzie]

You mean about smiling Herby?

Well, no-one wants a misery arse do they?

I wish they'd teach the kids outside sometimes here but they won't. Some kids learn better outside than being cooped up all the time

[Alison]

I dropped something on the floor when I was cooking the other day (a frequent occurrence) and a university friend of my son was helping me do the veg, and she said: "The 3-second rule: if you pick it up in 3 secs and blow any dirt off it, it's fine!" I was most relieved that my kids have such sensible friends! I think I have been operating the 3-sec rule all my life.

I'm not unhygienic - I would never use the chopping board for salad veg when I have just chopped raw meat on it, for example, and of course would wash my hands - but good honest dirt: there's plenty of it. And yes, all my four are pretty healthy!
And how many people these days use left-overs??
Alison.

[Piglet]

Aren't leftovers the best bit of sunday roast. We almost look forward to them more than the sunday lunch itself.

As for the 3 second rule, how sensible.

[Johnboy]

Hi Alison,
I simply adore "Bubble and Squeak" and to that end I always cook too much on the Sunday roast with that in mind. This week we had two surprise guests for lunch and I had to manufacture my B&S for Monday's meal and it is never the same. As for the 3 second rule I have never heard of it before but strangely have operated it all my life.
JB.

[Trevor Holloway]

My wife has an injury which means she sometimes drops things, we have used the 3 second rule for lots of things including whole roast chickens and legs of lamb!

She now no longer uses the deep fat fryer (twice been dropped and leaves a whole lot of mess to clear up).

[Mr Potato Head]

Sadly, my dog doesn't adhere to the 3-second rule, and insists on disposing of all dropped food herself.

[peter]

Mr PH, my dog operates a slightly different version of the three second rule to us humans, I suspect your hound shares the same canine version.

"If a dog can get to the dropped item, ingest it, move three feet away and assume an air of total innocence, all within three seconds from a fast asleep start in the other room, then, nothing was dropped and the whole event was a figment of some human's overactive imagination."