Please can we have some more 'funnies'?

A place to chat about anything you like, including non-gardening related subjects. Just keep it clean, please!

Moderators: Chantal, Tigger, KG Steve, peter, Chief Spud

User avatar
peter
KG Regular
Posts: 5492
Joined: Fri Nov 25, 2005 1:54 pm
Location: Near Stansted airport
x 374
Contact:

Re: Please can we have some more 'funnies'?

Postby peter » Wed Jul 31, 2019 7:46 pm

FB_IMG_1564513299336.jpg
FB_IMG_1564513299336.jpg (52.46 KiB) Viewed 824 times
6 x
Do not put off thanking people when they have helped you, as they may not be there to thank later.

I support http://www.hearingdogs.org.uk/
User avatar
Primrose
KG Regular
Posts: 6529
Joined: Tue Aug 29, 2006 8:50 pm
Location: Bucks.
x 1070

Re: Please can we have some more 'funnies'?

Postby Primrose » Fri Aug 09, 2019 4:18 pm

A soldier serving overseas far from home was annoyed and upset when his girl wrote to break off their engagement and ask for her photograph back.
He went out and collected from his friends all the unwanted photographs of women that he could find, bundled them all together, and sent them back with a note saying,
“I regret that I cannot remember which one you are. Please keep your photo and return the others.”
2 x
User avatar
Shallot Man
KG Regular
Posts: 2124
Joined: Thu Feb 09, 2006 9:51 am
Location: Basildon. Essex
x 211

Re: Please can we have some more 'funnies'?

Postby Shallot Man » Sat Aug 10, 2019 8:08 am

Primrose wrote:A soldier serving overseas far from home was annoyed and upset when his girl wrote to break off their engagement and ask for her photograph back.
He went out and collected from his friends all the unwanted photographs of women that he could find, bundled them all together, and sent them back with a note saying,
“I regret that I cannot remember which one you are. Please keep your photo and return the others.”


In my National Service day's it was called a "Dear John" letter.
1 x
User avatar
peter
KG Regular
Posts: 5492
Joined: Fri Nov 25, 2005 1:54 pm
Location: Near Stansted airport
x 374
Contact:

Re: Please can we have some more 'funnies'?

Postby peter » Sun Aug 18, 2019 5:57 pm

FB_IMG_1566034425536.jpg
FB_IMG_1566034425536.jpg (64.02 KiB) Viewed 735 times
3 x
Do not put off thanking people when they have helped you, as they may not be there to thank later.

I support http://www.hearingdogs.org.uk/
User avatar
alan refail
KG Regular
Posts: 7100
Joined: Sun Nov 27, 2005 7:00 am
Location: Chwilog Gogledd Orllewin Cymru Northwest Wales
x 392

Re: Please can we have some more 'funnies'?

Postby alan refail » Sun Aug 18, 2019 6:14 pm

cred.jpg
cred.jpg (54.23 KiB) Viewed 731 times
3 x
Cred air o bob deg a glywi, a thi a gei rywfaint bach o wir (hen ddihareb Gymraeg)
Believe one tenth of what you hear, and you will get some little truth (old Welsh proverb)
User avatar
Geoff
KG Regular
Posts: 4733
Joined: Thu Nov 24, 2005 5:33 pm
Location: Forest of Bowland
x 546

Re: Please can we have some more 'funnies'?

Postby Geoff » Sun Aug 18, 2019 6:59 pm

Had a boss once who used to get mixed up between Ann Summers and Sue Ryder. Proudly declared one year he had managed to do most of his Christmas shopping at Ann Summers.
5 x
User avatar
alan refail
KG Regular
Posts: 7100
Joined: Sun Nov 27, 2005 7:00 am
Location: Chwilog Gogledd Orllewin Cymru Northwest Wales
x 392

Re: Please can we have some more 'funnies'?

Postby alan refail » Tue Aug 20, 2019 9:02 pm

de.jpg
de.jpg (16.85 KiB) Viewed 688 times
7 x
Cred air o bob deg a glywi, a thi a gei rywfaint bach o wir (hen ddihareb Gymraeg)
Believe one tenth of what you hear, and you will get some little truth (old Welsh proverb)
User avatar
alan refail
KG Regular
Posts: 7100
Joined: Sun Nov 27, 2005 7:00 am
Location: Chwilog Gogledd Orllewin Cymru Northwest Wales
x 392

Re: Please can we have some more 'funnies'?

Postby alan refail » Fri Aug 23, 2019 7:16 am

ach.jpg
ach.jpg (42.49 KiB) Viewed 646 times
4 x
Cred air o bob deg a glywi, a thi a gei rywfaint bach o wir (hen ddihareb Gymraeg)
Believe one tenth of what you hear, and you will get some little truth (old Welsh proverb)
User avatar
peter
KG Regular
Posts: 5492
Joined: Fri Nov 25, 2005 1:54 pm
Location: Near Stansted airport
x 374
Contact:

Re: Please can we have some more 'funnies'?

Postby peter » Mon Aug 26, 2019 12:36 pm

Watch out for these...

IMG_20190826_123236_kindlephoto-36033142.png
IMG_20190826_123236_kindlephoto-36033142.png (579.86 KiB) Viewed 599 times
3 x
Do not put off thanking people when they have helped you, as they may not be there to thank later.

I support http://www.hearingdogs.org.uk/
User avatar
alan refail
KG Regular
Posts: 7100
Joined: Sun Nov 27, 2005 7:00 am
Location: Chwilog Gogledd Orllewin Cymru Northwest Wales
x 392

Re: Please can we have some more 'funnies'?

Postby alan refail » Sun Sep 01, 2019 11:01 am

Funny but so true in world as it has become :(


Image
3 x
Cred air o bob deg a glywi, a thi a gei rywfaint bach o wir (hen ddihareb Gymraeg)
Believe one tenth of what you hear, and you will get some little truth (old Welsh proverb)
User avatar
robo
KG Regular
Posts: 2277
Joined: Wed Oct 24, 2012 10:22 pm
Location: st.helens
x 678

Re: Please can we have some more 'funnies'?

Postby robo » Sun Sep 01, 2019 2:00 pm

Someone has to keep us idiots in work
0 x
User avatar
snooky
KG Regular
Posts: 741
Joined: Sun Aug 31, 2008 5:03 pm
Location: Farnborough
x 183

Re: Please can we have some more 'funnies'?

Postby snooky » Fri Sep 06, 2019 7:23 pm

The seven dwarfs




The seven dwarfs go to the Vatican , and because they are the seven dwarfs, they are immediately ushered in to see the Pope.
Grumpy leads the pack.

'Grumpy, my son,' says the Pope, 'What can I do for you?'

Grumpy asks, 'Excuse me your Excellency, but are there any dwarf nuns in Rome ?'

The Pope wrinkles his brow at the odd question, thinks for a moment and answers, 'No, Grumpy, there are no dwarf nuns in Rome .'

In the background, a few of the dwarfs start giggling.

Grumpy turns around and glares, silencing them.

Grumpy turns back, 'Your Worship, are there any dwarf nuns in all of Europe ?'

The Pope, puzzled now, again thinks for a moment and then answers, 'No, Grumpy, there are no dwarf nuns in Europe .

'This time, all of the other dwarfs burst into laughter.

Once again, Grumpy turns around and silences them with an angry glare.

Grumpy turns back and says, 'Mr.. Pope! Are there ANY dwarf nuns anywhere in the world?'

The Pope, really confused by the questions says, 'I'm sorry, my son, there are no dwarf nuns anywhere in the world.'

The other dwarfs collapse into a heap, rolling and laughing, pounding the floor, tears rolling down their cheeks, as they begin chanting......

'Grumpy shagged a penguin!'

'Grumpy shagged a penguin."
4 x
Regards snooky

---------------------------------
A balanced diet is a beer in both hands!
WARNING.!!... The above post may contain an opinion
User avatar
Shallot Man
KG Regular
Posts: 2124
Joined: Thu Feb 09, 2006 9:51 am
Location: Basildon. Essex
x 211

Re: Please can we have some more 'funnies'?

Postby Shallot Man » Sat Sep 07, 2019 8:38 am

snooky. Brilliant. :lol: :lol: :lol:
0 x
User avatar
snooky
KG Regular
Posts: 741
Joined: Sun Aug 31, 2008 5:03 pm
Location: Farnborough
x 183

Re: Please can we have some more 'funnies'?

Postby snooky » Sat Sep 07, 2019 8:24 pm

Joke



The Swede's wife stepped up to the tee and, as she bent over to place her ball, a gust of wind blew her skirt up and revealed her lack of underwear.
"Good God, woman! Why aren't you wearing any skivvies?", Ole demanded.
"Well, you don't give me enough housekeeping money to afford any," she replied. The Swede immediately reached into his pocket and said, "For the sake of decency, here's a $50. Go and buy yourself some underwear."

Next, the Irishman's wife bent over to set her ball on the tee. Her skirt also blew up to show that she, too, is wearing no undies. "Blessed Virgin Mary, woman! You've no knickers. Why not?" She replied, "I can't afford any on the little money you give me." Patrick reached into his pocket and
said, "For the sake of decency, here's a $20. Go out and buy yourself some underwear!"

Lastly, the Scotsman's wife bent over. The wind also took her
skirt over her head to reveal that she, too, is naked. "Sweet mudder of Jaysus,Aggie! Where the friggin hell are yer drawers?" She too explained, 'You dinna give me enough money to be able at affarrd any." The Scotsman reaches into his pocket and said, "Well, fer the love 'o decency, here's a comb. Tidy yerself up a bit.."
4 x
Regards snooky

---------------------------------
A balanced diet is a beer in both hands!
WARNING.!!... The above post may contain an opinion
User avatar
peter
KG Regular
Posts: 5492
Joined: Fri Nov 25, 2005 1:54 pm
Location: Near Stansted airport
x 374
Contact:

Re: Please can we have some more 'funnies'?

Postby peter » Sat Sep 07, 2019 10:48 pm

FB_IMG_1567892533574.jpg
FB_IMG_1567892533574.jpg (44.49 KiB) Viewed 457 times
2 x
Do not put off thanking people when they have helped you, as they may not be there to thank later.

I support http://www.hearingdogs.org.uk/

Return to “General chatter”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 5 guests