An announcement from WICOE.

[peter]

WICOE (Women In Charge Of Everything) is proud to announce the opening of its Evening Classes For Men.
NB Open to Men Only!

Note: due to the complexity and level of difficulty, each course will accept a maximum of eight participants

The course covers two days, and topics covered in this course include:

Day One.

How to fill Ice Cube Trays
Step by step guide with slide presentation

Toilet Rolls - Do they grow on the holders?
A round table discussion

Differences between Laundry Basket and Floor
Practising with hamper (Pictures and graphics)

Dishes and Cutlery - Do they levitate and fly to the Kitchen Sink or Dishwasher by themselves?
Debate among a panel of experts.

Remote Control
Losing the remote control - Help line and support groups

Learning how to find things
Starting with looking in the right place, instead of turning the house upside down while screaming.
Open forum

Day Two.

Empty Milk cartons - Do they belong in the Fridge or the Bin?
Group discussion and role play

Health Watch - Bringing her Flowers is not harmful to your health.
PowerPoint presentation

Real Men ask for directions when lost.
A real life testimonial from the one man who did.

Is it genetically impossible to sit quietly as she parallel parks?
Driving simulation

How to be the ideal Shopping Companion.
Relaxation exercises, meditation and breathing techniques.

Remembering Important Dates and Calling when you're going to be late.
Bring your calendar or PDA to class

Getting Over It, - Learning how to live with being wrong all the time.
Individual counsellors available

[oldherbaceous]

Dear Peter, they are definately the funniest ones i've read for a long time.

I've never even heard of laundry basket, is it something ladies carry clothes in, to take to the stream for washing.

[alan refail]

Bring your calendar or PDA to class

I never go out unless a good PDA is on the cards

[John]

Real men never get lost!

John

[Shallot Man]

HOW TO BE THE IDEAL SHOPPING COMPANION. Go to the Rugby Club while she doe's the shopping.

[Elaine]

Peter, this is brilliant! It describes my husband, apart from;

Losing the remote....he hardly bothers watching telly.
Asking for directions...he never gets lost.
Ideal shopping companion...he is, I hate shopping too so, we get round a shop and make purchases in record time.

All the rest apply and I don't think any amount of courses would improve him!

Cheers.

[glallotments]

What is it with the men and the asking directions bit?

I once went somewhere with a work colleague and we found the motorway shut so had to divert. He followed a guy who he said seemed to know where he was going. He did - he was going home so we ended up outside of his house.

Another time driving my boss and another male colleague to a conference we missed the motorway turn off (boss was supposed to be navigating). We ended up in the middle of Bolton instead of the Reebok stadium - and both despite entreaties from me just refused to ask for any directions. They said they knew where we should go - hours later we eventually arrived more through sheer good luck!!

By contrast when travelling with female colleagues if in doubt we pull up at the nearest shop/garage/hotel and just ask the way!

[macmac]

Some years ago my OH had to collect a relative from Nottingham, having seemingly travelled in circles he spotted a taxi driver outside a newsagents.He asked him how much the fare was to the address he wanted?The amount changed hands and the OH FOLLOWED the taxi to the address.Simples

[oldherbaceous]

Dear macmac, now thats just sheer initiative, very clever indeed.

[glallotments]

Some years ago my OH had to collect a relative from Nottingham, having seemingly travelled in circles he spotted a taxi driver outside a newsagents.He asked him how much the fare was to the address he wanted?The amount changed hands and the OH FOLLOWED the taxi to the address.Simples

This happened to us on holiday in Germany. It was very late and our coach driver was lost so he flagged down a taxi and followed him to our hotel!

[Chantal]

Both Seedling's boyfriend and my husband recently changed toilet rolls. We think they may be putting something in the water around here

I recall my dad getting lost when we were visiting his twin brother near Munich. He eventually pulled over and asked a passer by where "Zepplinstrasse" was and the bloke looked at him like he was insane; pointed at the sign above his head and walked off. We were 50 yards from the house

[lizzie]

My Grumpy Old Sod bought me flowers yesterday.........which was really very nice of him and a complete surprise to me. Lovely bouquet it was too........

It would have been nice if he'd taken the "reduced" sticker off first before giving me the flowers ........but the thought was there and, in fairness, there was nothing wrong with the said flowers......