Kitchen Garden Forum

Before we start....NO FILTHY ANSWERS!!!!

I would like my husband to finish fixing the roof on my greenhouse!Then a gardener (my alan) to do all the hard work for me.Im easily pleased

Dear Grockie, please allow me a couple of days to think of something polite.

How nice it is to see your name again by the way.

Hello my little Grockie bestest mate

I would like Father Christmas to put enough cash in my stocking top to pay for my little Irish trip next year. Enough for my tickets and the 5* hotel, plus some spends.

Alternatively, i'll take anything.........i'm not proud

I dod think of a few other things but you asked for polite answers only

Like Dear OH I need time to think about this..

You might be interested to know that on a visit to a store in Nottingham today I was entertained by their in-house music..... playing Christmas carols

....is this a first?

The sad thing is that I found myself singing along to them without realising what they were.. I did feel a fool

Forget the designer shoes, handbags and expensive jewellery. A trailer load of nice well rotted manure will do me just fine, (together with somebody to unload it and move it right to my veggie plot).

I would like a gardening assistant who is nice and strong and pleasing on the eye, and who does exactly what I ask, not his own interpretation which doesn't remotely resemble what I want doing.

A cast-iron guarantee that 2009 will be a better spring and summer than the last two years

Surely that's not asking much, is it

Dear Alan, did you use to ask for a trainset and bicycle when you were a boy, when everyone else was happy with an orange and nuts.

Dear OH

Yes -- but all I got was b****y nuts

How about Herby revealing his true identity and flashing a bit of leg..........that's make my Christmas AND birthday

The trailer load of manure is exactly what I got for my birthday about 15 years ago, Primrose. The following day we carted it all in the wheelbarrow to our vegetable patch at the back of the house. Later that day, I myself was carted (not in the wheelbarrow!) to hospital with breathlessness and chest pain and it turned out I had a collapsed lung, cause. by "over exertion"! So that birthday present didn't turn out exactly as planned.

For this year's Christmas, I could do with our allotment magically transformed from the steep slope it is now to a lovely flat and level site! I can but dream.

your dream has been granted....I am the xmas fairy

Dear Lizzie, you will just have to wait and see what Christmas brings.

first xmas card arrived this week!

and dear husband is even now looking at my amazon wishlist. he pointed out Leatherman makes a pruning thing with all sorts of attachments. i told him not this year. (a girl shouldn't buy a grafting tool before she has anything to graft, right?... right? )

i'd like some worms. i'll settle for earthworms, but am hoping dear husband will unbend on the "no livestock in the house" rule for the kitchen composting type. think i need to get rid of the mice, first. (i thought we had scared them off, when we accidentally forgot to check the "no-kill" mousetrap for two weeks. i was sure the poor thing's death squeaks would have scared off the mice for generations to come. now i have to go buy steel wool... and maybe some "ok, kill 'em just make 'em stop pooping on the kitchen table AAAARRRgh!" traps.)

thanks for letting me vent.