Kitchen Garden Forum

A little poem dedicated respectfully to our old friends Herbaceous and Codger.

Way down in deepest England,
In Bedfordshire so fair,
There’s a place called Milton Bryan,
With fine allotments there.

On one plot there’s a fine young man,
Herbaceous, proud and bold.
On the next plot there’s a Codger
Whom OH thinks is old.

The rivalry between this pair
Was wondrous to be seen:
Who could grow the biggest spud
And who the longest bean,

Whose carrot had the longest root,
Whose broad beans tasted best.
So to settle all the arguments
They planned a little test.

The idea was they’d do a trial
On how to grow potatoes.
OH said “I’ll just use my spade.”
OC said “Rotovators!”

OH picked up his trusty spade,
And the first grassed sod he parted.
But – “Oh, what’s that?” he thought
As OC’s rotovator started.

So up and down the plots they went,
They worked the whole day through.
Never a moment’s rest they took,
The soil and compost flew.

Until at last the evening fell,
The day was almost done.
OC had done a hundred rows
And OH – just the one!

It is possible to change the names in the last verse to suit your preferences

Well done Alan

I await the response and I have a pretty good idea what it will be

Dear Alan, i wouldn't have minded if you had put the last verse on.


The reason O.H failed to win,
Is very plain to see,
He'd popped round to O.C's wifes,
For a lovely cup of tea.

Dear Alan, I think your poem was brilliant,Iam stuck for words. thats more than OH would admit

OH

Just for that I won't change the last verse to let you win

Alan

PS Or we could have:

The reason O.H failed to win,
Is very plain to see,
He'd popped round to O.C's wifes,
And she put something in his tea.

Dear Alan, i have printed some copies of your poem off, it is sure to make for some very happy faces around Milton Bryan.

Thank you so much, absolutely brilliant.

The months passed by, one, two and three.
OH’s spuds had grown.
But OC’s plot remained quite bare;
Not a thing had shown.

OC was puzzled,
Scratched his head.
What had he done wrong?
“It’s pretty obvious”, OH said.

“While I was planting nice and slow,
You were chasing your rotovator.
I watched you, and you forgot to plant
A single seed potato!”

Hi Alan,

Absolutely brilliant, well done oldherbaceous winning I mean!

but I am feeling sorry for Old Codger now!!

donedigging

Dear Alan, The reason my potatoe patch was bare,is because i have dug two rows of my early potatoes,and re-set the ground, with 6 courgettes and 5 marrows.

I have 3 pieces of allotment,and i still struggle to find room to set every thing.