Kitchen Garden Forum

Clever Alan & Tony!

You've got to love the British for turning any situation into a joke! Us Aussie's used to think we were pretty clever & we are; but you know the heritage!

Westi

I'm pretty speechless! Really? And can someone explain the 'and may contain nuts' bit? And there German as well so can't excuse the translation from Chinese.

Peanuts aren't nuts. Perhaps these can be contaminated with nuts. Of course most people with a so called nut allergy react to peanuts, not sure if they react to nuts as well. I think the label 'may contain nuts' has to be added to anything that may have peanuts in. Nuts!

Whatever happened to commonsense.

Editorial comment: In the USA missing children's photo details, etc are printed on the sides of milk cartons.

Funny Primrose!

A friend sent me this one …

During a lull between the speeches at the recent presidential
swearing-in ceremony, Melania Trump leaned over to chat
with the Secretary of State, Rex Tillerson.
"Ya know, I bought Donald a parrot for Christmas. That bird is
so smart, Donald has already taught him to pronounce over two
hundred words!"
"Wow, that's pretty impressive," said Tillerson, "but, you do
realize that he just speaks the words, ...he doesn't really
understand what they mean."
"Oh, I know," Melania replied, "Neither does the parrot."

https://www.facebook.com/andy.seatherto ... 753751582/

I think this must be one of Southern's trains.

Beryl.

Letter in one of the daily papers today, on Theresa May holding Donald Trump's hand:

I think Mrs May was just making sure she knew where his hand was.

I remember the corned beef of my childhood
And the bread that we cut with a knife
When the children helped with the housework
And the men went to work, not the wife
The cheese never needed a fridge
And the bread was so crusty and hot
The children were seldom unhappy
And the wife was content with her lot.

I remember the milk from the bottle
With the yummy cream on the top
Our dinner came hot from the oven
And not from the freezer or shop
The kids were a lot more contented
They didn't need money for kicks
Just a game with their friends on the road
And sometimes the Saturday flicks.

I remember the slap on my backside
And the taste of the soap if I swore
Anorexia and diets weren't heard of
And we hadn't much choice what we wore.

Do you think that bruised our ego
Or our initiative was destroyed?
We ate what was put on the table
And I think life was better enjoyed.

Amen to that Gerry( are we still allowed to say Amen?)oops said it again lol.

I think you'll find that should be Apeople.

Pat said to Mick "what's that you have there mick"
Mick replied " it a thing called a thermos flask"
What douse it do Mick
It keeps hot things hot and cold thing cold
What have you got in it Mick
I have 2 cups of tea an ice cream

Risqué one.

According to a professional comedian of my acquaintance one of the first jokes banned by the BBC.

"Did you hear about the architect who had his house made backwards so he could watch TV? "